Forever Lulu (1987)

“My stars have uncrossed.”

In the film, Forever Lulu, Elaine (Hanna Schygulla) works for a toilet seat company by day and writes scripts for adult films by night. But what she really wants to do is to write a serious novel. Things go from bad to worse when she’s fired, receives an eviction notice, and her agent tells her to re-write her novel to make it more sensationalistic. Just as things hit rock bottom, Elaine’s life changes when a smartly dressed couple mistake Elaine for a mugger and hand over their valuables. Soon Elaine is being stalked by a Mafia hit man and surrounded by dead bodies.

The plot is, obviously, far-fetched. Normally, this sort of thing might be carried off if it contained great comic performances. Unfortunately Forever Lulu is cursed with cliched lines and uneven performances. Some of the roles are surprisingly good–the snotty waiter, for example. And the role of Elaine’s blind date, the obnoxious life insurance salesman, is a gem. Other performances are simply bad. Hanna Schygulla is a fine German actress, and Deborah Harry (from Blondie) has managed to deliver some good performances in the past too. Deborah Harry stars as the elusive and mysterious Lulu in this film. This role doesn’t call for many lines–just a few appearances, and the few lines Harry has aren’t very exciting. Schygulla and Harry–in spite of their talents–just can’t drag this film anywhere. All in all, Forever Lulu tries hard–perhaps too hard–but it’s just not an interesting, original or funny film.